The greatest single problem facing America today is unemployment among middle-aged white American bloggers residing in small Southern towns. Although to be fair there is anecdotal evidence that the unemployment situation is widespread.
If we look to history for answers, we find…well, a lot of dates and numbers that are absolutely no help. Turns out that Leftists revised the actual history even before the fish we wrapped it in began to smell bad. This is why we think of Franklin Roosevelt as the savior of the republic instead of some creepy guy who married his cousin and smoked cigarettes like a drag queen.
The truth is our economic revival then, and our economic strength for the next 30 years, had much more to do with a German fellow that looked like Oliver Hardy after Jenny Craig. That and some crazy Japanese. You will of course excuse the redundancy regarding the Japanese.
The unemployment rate among Americans prior to the German hostile takeover of proto-EU was approximately 25%. Considering that women only made up 10-15% of the workforce, and no one even bothered to count anyone that wasn’t white, this equaled a 145% unemployment rate. Wait, that was according to my Leftist calculator. Using a calculator that produces real numbers, it is estimated that 50% of Americans were without work.
World War Two, and especially our good fortune not to have participated in the qualifier rounds, poured vast amounts of “stimulus” into a country whose economy was primarily export and manufacturing led. The end result of all this “stimulus” exploding in every other advanced economy but ours gave the US a virtual monopoly on manufactured goods for the next thirty years. We enjoyed the largest expansion of middle class wealth and TV shows about scary Celtic looking puppets the world has ever witnessed.
In our current off- Broadway reprise of “The Great Depression” the situation is markedly different. America today mostly exports agricultural products and weapons to damage foreign cultures, so setting aside Lady Gaga and “Terminator” movies, that leaves only the farmers employed in export.
Bearing in mind our national goal is to gainfully employ middle aged men to stem the blogging, our task is daunting. We have a service based economy that is dominated by large scale service providers. Entrepreneurial opportunities are constrained by megalithic competition, unavailability of credit, and enough government taxation and regulation to depress Richard Simmons.
Taking an example from the 1930’s, let us say you wished to start a snack foods company, similar to Mr. Lay and Mr. Frito. Actually the second gentleman was named Fritolopulis, but decided against using his Greek-American name to sell his product in the Southwest.
Both men began their business’ using cheap readily available ingredients prepared in home based facilities. Imagine trying that in our modern America. It is highly doubtful that your garage would meet the requirements of the city, county, state, and federal codes, regulations, restrictions and inspections. Not to mention, what the hell are you going to come up with that’s cheaper than what Frito-Lay pays for corn and potatoes? I can only advise you that my line of cardboard snacks was not well received.
Our nation cannot move forward to a prosperous future without addressing the unemployment of the middle-aged blogger segment. We risk an entire generation of young Americans growing up to see 50 year old men only as smelly drunken relics, and those would be the government workers with jobs.
Let us all hope that it doesn’t take another world war to rescue us from this economic nightmare. Let us also pray that if one happens it’s between the Chinese and the Europeans and they need cardboard snack foods.